One overcast summers day in 1990 during the six weeks holiday, I was in fact bored. So I decided to jump into my wheelchair, and find adventure. I went to call for a friend of mine. Mark was his name, ginger hair, glasses and freckles. We decided to go for a ride together. (nice)

We were going nowhere in particular, then we saw a sign saying, public footpath. I said, "I haven't seen that before, have you?" Mark said, "I wonder where it leads to?" So between us we thought we'd better take a look and investigate. We decided to go the way the sign pointed, not really knowing what lay ahead. As we went along we discovered that the path was not actually a concrete path but mud, mud, and more bloody mud. At one side the mud made an embankment, which was about 4ft high with weeds growing out of it. The weeds were interspersed with nettles, which I duly caught my arm on. It didn't hurt much because I can take it, I'd been through worse before.

Also at the top of this embankment was an old railway line, but we couldn't get to it as it was too high. At the other side of the so called path was a wire fence, also interspersed with weeds. We were trundling along, as you do in a wheelchair. It was like going through a maze. Twists and turns, ups and downs, it was like been on a boat at see on a bad day. We now were beginning to know why it was called the 7 alleys. I got a little bit stuck because I went into a hole. Mark said, "what did you go in that hole for? you could have got stuck." He went mad at me. I said, "shut up and push me out." He managed to push me out with his wheelchair. "I think we'd better go back now," Mark said. "No let's carry on and see where we get to," I replied. Of course Mark was not too happy about this. So on my insistence we carried on and on and on and on to the end. We couldn't get any further, because it was a railway bridge with steps. I don't know if you know this but it's a little bit hard getting up steps in a wheelchair. So we decided to turn round. Whilst I was doing my manoeuvre to turn round I got stuck in the mud. I was trying to get out, and my wheels were just spinning round and round. I made the hole bigger than it was originally. Mark even tried to push me, but all to no avail. He moved me a little bit, whilst I was shouting, "keep going Mark, just keep going."

He did eventually get me out, but, as I moved, my footrest got caught in the wire fence. I was trying to get out and Mark was trying to get me out as well, this time with no luck. We were trying for about 15 minutes. There was nobody about to help us. There was only me, Mark and the weeds.

At this point I started to laugh. I thought it was funny. Unfortunately Mark didn't. He was calling me all the names under the sun. You know like you fool and what an idiot you are. And if you believe that you will believe anything.

So leaving me stuck in the fence, Mark decided to go and look for help. He went to the cemetery, which was down one of the alleys. He found an old couple putting flowers on a grave, either that or they were looking for somewhere to live later on. He told them what had happened, and they wanted to ring the police. He told them to forget it, and toddled off to find someone else. As you do.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, sorry I mean back at the spot where I am now stuck, I was beginning to think that Mark was not coming back. I did in fact think I had been abandoned, because at least thirty minuets had gone by. I actually thought that I would be here all night.

Meanwhile, back in the cemetery with Mark and the gravestones, (scenery or what eh) Anyway back to Mark, who by now had found the warden from the cemetery. So Mark began to explain what had happened. "I think I'd better come with you," said the warden. Probably thinking, "what the hell have I got myself into here?" but he toddled off with Mark never the less.

Picture the scene, it's getting dark. There's a kid in a wheelchair, stuck in a fence, thinking, "well that's it I have been abandon, I might as well go to sleep." But then I had this awful thought that if I did go to sleep someone might jump out from nowhere and murder me. (I like to look on the bright side of things) Of course by now all kinds of things were going through my mind. Like, where's the helicopter that is supposed to come looking for missing people, and where the hell did Mark go to? I will probably kill him if I ever get out of this mess. (bit of drama there, I'm getting good at this, so would you if you'd been in my predicament) With that, I heard a noise. I looked round, and thought, "Oh my God this is it, I'll soon be joining everyone else in the cemetery, I'll even beat the old couple to it." But no it was Mark, with a man, (releif or what) who I thought was a police man because he had a walkie talkie with him. After what had seemed like hours, I was set free from my trap in a matter of minutes. He had to keep tugging and tugging at my chair to get me loose from the fence. (Freed at last) I would also like to note at this point that I did actually shout down the alley as Mark appeared, something along the lines of, Mark, my friend where have you been. Alright, I'll come clean. I did in actual fact shout, "Mark, where the **** have you been?" fortunately the warden did not understand what I was saying.

We went back home through the graveyard, and Mark went mad at me again, because I went over someone's grave. (I thought this could have been my home had I had to stop in that alley much longer)

All the way home Mark was going mad at me. He went on and on that much he made my ears bleed. (by the way we went home via a sensible route, on Marks insistence)

When I eventually got home My Mam said, "Where have you been and what have you been up to?" "Oh! nothing much. I only got myself stuck down somewhere called the 7 alleys."

So I had to relay the story to her, which made her laugh.

Mark on the other hand took a little bit longer to see the funny side of it. After a few days of not talking to me, he forgave me for what had happened and we often had a good laugh about it. As well as a few more adventures. Maybe one day I may write about them.

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